It's been hard, but at the same time I've found strength to carry on. I think because I expected it to be hard it hasn't been too hard to handle. But the hours after he left I sobbed and sobbed. At 11 o'clock at night I cried to my mom {bless her heart} and sat on the kitchen floor. I missed him already. It seemed he had become imaginary, a ghost or a figment of something I dreamed. He didn't feel tangible or attainable. He was gone. And I was still here.
All these doubts started to surface, like "Could we make it two years? What kind of people will we be? Will we still love each other? Will he forget about me? Will I forget about him?"
But soon after I received a letter from an Elder Armstrong and my heart leaped. I couldn't read that letter fast enough. He still loved me! He told me about all the adventures he had had thus far and how exhausted he was. My love and admiration grew ten times after reading that letter. And it continues to grow every time I see a letter addressed to me and I read his scribbly handwriting.
It was amazing and comforting to see how many people have reached out to me this past week, giving me words of encouragement and advice on how to weather the next two years without my partner in crime. It's really helped and made me feel peaceful.
I've come to accept that there will come certain times where I'll want to tell Dex about a nightmare I had, or ask him certain questions, or share something with him that'll make him laugh, but he won't be there. Instead of him being a text message away or a few blocks down the road, he's now a letter away and hundreds of miles from me.
But I'm so excited for the adventures to come! I'm excited for him to get to DC {this Wednesday} and for me to start my mission! Life is exciting and wonderful! These next few years are going to be the most memorable moments of my life and I'm excited for them!
No comments:
Post a Comment